Can you be asexual and also enjoy kink at the same time? Well, if this question was asked a few years ago, the answer could have possibly been a ‘no’ but now, with evolving and ever-changing times, the preferences of people are also changing. There are many people who are asexual but enjoy kink in the bedroom. But isn’t kink a type of sexual desire of a certain set of people? A user on Reddit raised a similar query about the term ‘asexual kink’ since they’re both contradictory terms. BDSM for Beginners: From Ball Gag to Cuffs, 4 Kinky Toys That Are a Must-Have!

Let’s start with basics here. Being asexual means not feeling the urge to be sexually involved with their partners. An asexual individual may be attracted to someone but may not be turned on or would feel the urge to masturbate thinking about their attraction. As for kinky sex, it is a form of bondage or any kind of unusual/ uncommon sex activity such as a foot fetish or BDSM. While being asexual means being completely averse to sex, one can derive sexual pleasure from kinky activities in the bedroom. Now, aces are divided into three categories – Aesthetics, romantic and sexual. As the name suggests, aesthetics means they’re attracted to someone physically, romantic attraction refers to having the desire to have a romantic relationship and sexual ace is pretty much a self-explanatory term.

For some kinky aces (asexual kinks), having sexual desire may be difficult whereas for some, masturbating, getting turned on and having sex is a part of the process. For these people, kinks and fetishes mainly revolve around items and situations like being probed by the aliens or popping a balloon. Being asexual means you don’t experience sexual attraction but that doesn’t mean that you don’t get turned on. However, after being aroused, you have no desire to have sex – this is another way of looking at it.

All in all, everyone’s designed differently and some asexual kinks happen to have a libido and they do enjoy sexual experiences despite not being sexually attracted to someone. Kinks or fetishes only add more ‘excitement’ or fun element to the equation, thereby making it pleasurable for an asexual person too.

(The above story first appeared on LatestLY on Nov 28, 2020 09:24 PM IST. For more news and updates on politics, world, sports, entertainment and lifestyle, log on to our website latestly.com).