Talking about sex is still considered a taboo especially in the Indian society and more so when it is about women. The society is just seeing a little change with women open to talking about menstruation but discussing sexual problems and anxiety still remain hush-hush. Orgasm anxiety is one the sexual problems faced by all genders in bed. Several people may be experiencing it without realising it is actually a well-termed problem. We commonly hear of performance anxiety among the men while orgasm anxiety is experienced more by women. Women shy away from talking about their bedroom secrets and thus these things remain unaddressed and ignored.

A study has said that almost 25% of the women have never experienced an orgasm and have difficulty facing one. While the women who are orgasmic have a fewer frequency of reaching the pleasure. Other research also states that women do not routinely experience an orgasm during a sexual encounter. Haven't you then read of women faking it just to please their partner? It is thus important to talk about and get an understanding of the problem.

Let us help you understand the meaning, causes and how to beat orgasm anxiety.

What is Orgasm Anxiety?

When you overthink about your orgasm and in the process do not enjoy the actual process of reaching there, getting distracted in the sexual encounter is called as an orgasm anxiety. It is the feeling of anxiousness that a person experiences because of their inability to relax, perform, and have a good time in a sexual space.

The thoughts could be anything about your own body, your partner's experience or how do you sound/look all of which makes it harder to perform.

The causes of orgasm anxiety:

Try and understand what is causing orgasm anxiety (Photo credits: Unsplash)

Yes, you have too many thoughts while a sexual encounter but there has to be some reasoning as to why you experience them again and again. So the causes of orgasm anxiety can vary from a person to person.

  • Negative thoughts about one's body: Women tend to undermine their own bodily features. Some may doubt they breasts' size as being too small or too big or even about their vaginal area. This can affect the sexual excitement.

  • Misconceptions about sex: Since sex is such a tabooed topic among the society, women develop misconceptions about it. Females may not even enjoy masturbation as they view it as unclean and bad. With such attitudes, the sexual encounter only becomes an anxious process.

  • Fear of arousing sadness and repressed memories: If a woman has gone through a traumatic relationship in the past, then getting along sexually with someone else can incur past memories and bring sadness. For someone who has experienced sexual abuse, the experience does not remain one of pleasure. Since most people also relate emotions with sexual encounters, it can cause painful responses during sexual interaction.

  • Fear of losing control: Self-control is one of the protective defense mechanism women resort to. Losing control could be in the sense of making loud noises or moving too hard, urinating when letting go.

These are some of the reasons which emerge a lot of pressure in the person as they indulge in a sexual intercourse. These anxieties only make it hard to perform.

How can you deal with Orgasm Anxiety?

Deal with ways to cure orgasm anxiety (Photo credits: Unsplash)

The basic problem is that people are suffering from the condition but do not know about it. If you are a woman who has tried faking an orgasm then it is time you just stop and accept your problem of orgasm anxiety. You are not alone in this, there are many women out there could be even your best of friends. But you would not know unless you open about it.

  • Speak Up: One of the reasons sex and sex problems remain a taboo because the ones who are suffering from them treat it like one. You will not know what and why exactly you are facing this problem unless you talk about it to someone. Remove the fear of what your partner might feel and talk to them clearly. They are the best ones to make you feel comfortable about your anxieties in bed.

  • Remove all the negative self thoughts: Women always go ahead and compare themselves leading to self-loathing thoughts. Go ahead and be confident of your body. Reassure yourself that you deserve to feel pleasure.

  • Masturbate or just explore your body: Leave away all 'wrong' thoughts behind and touch yourself. Understand your own pleasure points and do not feel shy about it. It is very natural and will just help yourself better when you are in a sexual encounter next. You can lead your partner on giving you the pleasure. But well, be careful about ways to masturbate.

  • Consult a doctor/psychologist: Anxiety is all in the mind and like all your other worries an orgasm anxiety also needs to be addressed. Reach out to a psychologist or sex specialist if you are not comfortable talking about it to anyone you know. Talk to them and they will help you out with some ways.

An orgasm anxiety is more prominent among the women but it does not mean men do not face this problem. This is in f, in fact,of the leading causes of erectile dysfunction among the men. Do not ignore the orgasm anxiety because at the end of the day we all deserve a good rather a pleasurable time. Do not let you or your partner's worries spoil your special moments in bed.

(The above story first appeared on LatestLY on May 21, 2018 04:44 PM IST. For more news and updates on politics, world, sports, entertainment and lifestyle, log on to our website latestly.com).