Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan Movie Review: I may have written this part in some of my previous reviews for a Salman Khan movie, but if Bhai can keep repeating his shite in every film, why can't I? So the thing I want to repeat is that I feel bad for a Salman Khan fan. They are so steadfast in their devotion to their superstar that when you hear them clap or cheer for a scene that otherwise passes muster, your heart goes out for them. I also wish Salman Khan's heart actually went out to them too, so that he stops churning out 'masterpieces' like Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan. They deserve better, we deserve better and the entire humanity deserves better. Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan Review: Salman Khan's Family Entertainer Garners Mixed Reactions From Netizens!

Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan is directed by Farhad Samji, and if that name doesn't ring any warning bells for you, then congrats, you have saved yourselves from watching some of the worst films from Bollywood these years. The director is so popular that Akshay fans were seen trending a Twitter petition to have him removed from directing Hera Pheri 3, even though there was no official announcement about him helming the film. So when Salman Khan is in his very Bhai-mode, which means there is very negligible effort by the actor to even attempt at emoting, and he is being directed by Mr Samji, then expect the product to be a very potent one. Predictably, Kisi Ka Dard Kisi Ka Gas is exactly that. Sorry for that wordplay in the title, but the movie's name truly invites the trolls.

In Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan, Salman Khan plays 'Bhaijaan'. That's his name. No one, not even his three annoying brothers (Raghav Juyal, Jassie Gill and Sidharth Nigam) - whose own names I quickly forgot as soon as they are uttered - nor even the man himself knows his real name. I wonder what name is there on his Aadhar Card. Salman films make you think of trivialities like that because the screenplay doesn't.

Anyway, Bhaijaan is not only a protective elder brother to his three siblings but also to his entire colony that is under the eye of an evil developer (Vijender Singh). Bhaijaan is also a bachelor, which makes the romantic lives of his brothers complicated. Why, I have no clue. At no point, I remember him telling them not to marry or romance anyone. In fact when he knows of their love stories, he readily agrees.

To complicate what was a matter that just needed a simple conversation to solve, the brothers decide to get Bhaijaan fall in love first, and so Bhagya (Pooja Hegde) walks into their lives and into Bhaijaan's heart. The beautiful Pooja Hegde gives such an over-exuberant performance that it feels like she is double-compensating for the lack of histrionics of her older co-star and their invisible chemistry.

Bhagya has a joint family back in Hyderabad, and her elder brother Balakrishna (Venkatesh) is a peace-loving man. So Bhaijaan and his brothers go from Delhi to Hyderabad to seek his blessings, and then to protect him and his family from a baddie Nageshwar (Jagapathi Babu in his usual mould).

Watch the Trailer of Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan:

Pretty sure in some of the reviews of Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ka Jaan, there will be a mention of how the script feels like it is written by ChatGPT. I beg to differ. I am hundred percent sure that ChatGPT can write a better script than what is served here. For the uninitiated, Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ka Jaan is the remake of the Ajith-starrer Tamil film, Veeram, a movie that is as ordinary as it comes, and doesn't really deserve any remake. In fact, the past remake attempts in other languages had failed at the box office. But who would explain such trivialities to Bhaijaan? PS: Veeram itself was inspired by a Malayalam film Valyettan, starring Mammootty, that's also an ordinary film that hasn't aged well. Wonder what it says about our creators here.

In the script, Salman saw quite the many opportunities to lend his real-life persona, and crack some meta jokes about himself that I wish I was also in on the joke as a viewer. There is this whole gag scene involving Bhagyashree, her husband Himalaya and son Abhimanyu Dassani where Bhai invokes his star-turning Maine Pyar Kiya memories that should have looked cute on screen. Instead, it stretches beyond amusing (Abhimanyu out-acts everyone in the scene) and just reminds us of how Salman's earlier heroines are now stuck with mother roles, while Bhai has moved on to romancing younger heroies. Why, his KKBKKJ co-star Pooja Hegde was born a year after Maine Pyar Kiya came out. Interestingly, no meta jokes were made when Bhumika Chawla, Bhai's Tere Naam heroine who plays Venkatesh's wife here, entered the picture. Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan: Bhagyashree, Himalay Dassani and Abhimanyu Dassani Make Cameos in Salman Khan Film.

Like with Jai Ho, the film also allows Bhai to be a Bhai and cast a couple of Bigg Boss contestants (Siddharth Nigam, Shehnaaz Gill) and other rank newcomers to hail him. Also since 'South' is in the flavour, and for Bollywood, 'South' presently means Telugu cinema, the movie has most of the second half set in Hyderabad, add a couple of lungi-waving songs that will make you grow more respect for Chennai Express' "Lungi Dance" while dragging poor Ram Charan for about 15 seconds in one of the songs. Saw some of the Telugu fans asking why Venkatesh was in Rana Naidu, instead, they should have been asking what the Telugu superstar found so interesting when he said yes to this film. The only three actors I somewhat cared for were Tej Sapru, Aasif Sheikh and the late Satish Kaushik, who did manage to bring some smiles even with the bad jokes given to them, though they were also kept away from the screen when the film needed them the most.

Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ka Jaan also gets Salman to involve himself into some bloody action, where men get massacred left, right and centre and no one bats an eyelid. I mean, there is a fight scene in a Metro train leaves many bodies in the aftermath, and the heroes walk away with absolute no consequence.

Perhaps, this is Samji's idea of showing the contemporary state of this country, where people are now getting used to violence and even get away with it, where a family prays for a non-violent man to turn violent and cheers when he does that. Move over the violence part, we have sparks flying between a boy and a girl where the latter complete a Bhagwad Geeta shloka uttered by the former, and 'Vande Mataram' is randomly inserted into punchlines. Hey, if you didn't see the 'brilliant' satire in the screenplay, be happy then when Bhai going perfunctorily shirtless in the climax and showing off his abs, while leaving us to debate where real ab-lines end and VFX begins.

Final Thoughts

Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ka Jaan is an utter slog to watch through its charmless performances, annoying number of songs and insipid screenplay that offers little even for Salman Khan fans to cheer. And this comes from someone who cheered the most in the theatre when Bhai landed in style during Pathaan! Kisi Ka Bhai Kisi Ki Jaan manages to be a very annoying Salman Khan film and that's saying something!

Rating:1.5

(The above story first appeared on LatestLY on Apr 21, 2023 01:54 PM IST. For more news and updates on politics, world, sports, entertainment and lifestyle, log on to our website latestly.com).